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"Pardon Our Appearance" & other useful cliches to use while redesiging one's site . . .

Adventures in Website ReDesign:

the PlaceHolder Frame 1 . . .

Wait. What?! This is an outrage. Who you callin' a “Place Holder”?! Do I LOOK like a “Place Holder” to you?!?! -- and be very careful how you answer that question.

What a crock -- he keeps mumbling and blathering and shouting on and on with this baloney about “Finally! I’ve got a handle on my new website!” and, “I’m on a roll!” and “Gotta switch to the blog . . . gotta switch to the blog!” It’s all just an excuse for him not going out there, doing his job, and shoveling the damn snow!

If he doesn’t start soon we’ll starve to death in here! I doubt that I need to remind anyone that we suffered a direct hit from this Cyclone Bomb -- or whatever silly nomenclature they’ve come up with to describe this crap . We are buried. We are trapped! If I step out there I’ll be LOST . . . gone . . . disappeared . . . never to be seen again until the thaw when my frozen corpse would be uncovered like some neanderthal who didn’t know any better. Next thing you know, I’ll be stuck in some museum lab, poked and prodded for all of my secrets; flayed & displayed on some slab for all the world to see.

All so that HE can work on a silly . . . “website” . . . a “BLOG.” Who cares?! Stop taking my picture. I am NOT a “PlaceHolder!!!” At least turn on the tv so I can watch some football. And put a log on that fire, ya Bozo. I am a bear in his winter coat and even I’m cold in here! Jeezus.

I bet her Highness the CAT is doing just fine. Lazy, arrogant ingrate. SHE gets whatever she wants. Ridiculous. This is probably all just part of her ongoing plot to get rid of me. How did I end up HERE?!


Ric Kallaher

Ric is: • a Professional Portrait Photographer specializing in working with small business owners towards enhancing their B2B online goals via executive portraits as well as images that tell the story of a business with on-site photography of facilities &/or product photography ; • an experienced Events Photographer who spectacularly documents high end awards shows and high-society special events, especially in regard to the People of Advertising, Media, Arts and Culture. • an insightful image-maker with a detailed eye who helps interior designers bring their work to life. • an award-winning wedding photographer who helps couples document their special day. Ric's Photographic Mission: To artfully create strong, provocative & transcendent visual records of meaningful relationships & significant moments. Additionally, Ric is a trained actor and experienced music producer who has often been heard applying his voice over talents to ongoing advertising campaigns. He has been the voice on national campaigns for the likes of SuperValu Grocery Stores, Texaco, Kendall Motor Oil, Campbell's Soups and more. He has even appeared ON-camera in an ad for Comedy Central as a scream therapist. His is represented by Ann Wright Reps.